By Niki Turner
When people disappoint us—whether directly or indirectly—it hurts. When the people we have invested our time and energy in fail to live up to our expectations, we experience symptoms of shock, confusion, guilt, grief, and despair.
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This week I learned two of my kids have been doing some "stupid teenager tricks." I was crushed. Besides being furious with them, I was furious with myself. Surely, if I had done a better job raising them, this could have been prevented. Fear and doubt for their futures began to assail my mind. Anger with them for putting me in this miserable state added to my despair. I'm sure the empty feeling I experienced is similar to the horror God knew when He looked into the garden and saw Adam taking a bite of that forbidden fruit.
But just as God didn't curl up on his heavenly throne and feel sorry for Himself after the fall, He doesn't intend for us remain in that state of disappointment and grief. Just as He proactively set in motion His plan to redeem His children, God wants us to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and move forward in faith.
Disappointment is inevitable when we're dealing with fallible humans, but how long we stay there is up to us. It depletes our supply of the spirit, robs us of the joy of the Lord that is our strength, and hinders us from running our race.
The prophet Samuel experienced the same trouble during his ministry. Samuel had anointed Saul as the first king of Israel. As Saul's spiritual leader, I'm sure they developed a close relationship. Then Saul made a grave error that cost him the kingdom. He chose the fear of men over the fear of God, and “…rejected the word of the Lord” through disobedience.
1 Samuel 15:34-35 tells us the prophet returned to his house in Ramah and "went to see Saul no more." Mourning a broken relationship or broken trust is perfectly normal, for a time. Apparently though, instead of going through the process and beginning to heal, Samuel stayed in that place of sorrow until God had to snap him out of it. It’s not God’s will for His servants to sit around in mourning for extended periods of time!
In 1 Samuel 16:1, the Lord says to Samuel, "How long will you mourn for Saul, seeing I have rejected him from reigning over Israel? Fill your horn with oil, and go; I am sending you to Jesse the Bethlehemite. For I have provided Myself a king among his sons."
The Lord’s instructions to Samuel are His instructions to us today when we find ourselves disappointed and grieved by the actions of others. We know oil refers to the anointing of the Holy Spirit. Isaiah 61 says God gives us the oil of joy in place of mourning. The horn referred to here was the container used to carry that oil. Under the new covenant, we carry the anointing in our spirits. So fill up on the anointed Word, pray in the Spirit, and be built up by speaking to yourself in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs. Let the anointing in your life be refilled and refreshed, and then get up and go do it again. God is sending you out proactively as a repairer of the breach, as one who will rebuild relationships, and restore what has been torn down by the enemy. Imagine what would have happened if Samuel hadn't gone out again...David wouldn't have taken his place as Israel's greatest king.
Just as it was vital for God's plan that Samuel get over Saul's failure, you are necessary to the Body of Christ, to your family, to your workplace, and to God's plan for the world. Fill your horn with oil, and GO!
Heavenly Father, I pray for every person reading this who is distressed and disappointed. Lord, speak to their hearts now as you spoke to Samuel, remind them of the calling on their lives and the plans you have for their future. Let Your anointing flood their spirits and refresh them to continue the good works You have prepared for them. In Jesus' name, amen.
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I needed this today, Niki. Have I mentioned lately how much I appreciate your posts?
ReplyDeleteThanks for the encouragement (and the swift kick in the pants)
Amen.
ReplyDeleteOne of the best pieces of advice I recieved as a young mom was "Pray that they get caught." Ouch. The last thing I want to deal with is the pain and shock of our kids doing something bad.
ReplyDeletePraise God! The Klarich kid's red flag events have often opened up much deeper issues that could have had catatstrophic consequences left undiscovered.
Jesus is so good. He never gives up on us or our children.
Thank you Niki. Amen!!!
Lisa, thank you. I needed to hear that. Doubt tends to bleed over from one arena to another for me!
ReplyDeleteBlessings, my dear!
Dina,
ReplyDeleteNow that I think about it, a number of us have had "opportunities" to put this into play this year. : )
Cheryl,
ReplyDeleteThat is EXACTLY what happened! We've been believing for that same thing for years. "Inside knowledge" is essential for parents!
You're right, God is good, and He loves them even more than I do!
Blessings!
I needed this post today, Niki -- thanks so much for your transparency, compassion, and encouragement. I've been stuck like Samuel in my disappointment and it's not a good place to be. Or a godly place. What a blessing that God never gives up on us or our kids.
ReplyDeleteCheryl, I am going to start praying that my kids get caught!
Wonderful and encouraging post, Niki. Teenagers will test parents. I think it's a law.:) And don't get any ideas that you're not a wonderful parent. All we can do as parents is the best we can do and leave the rest in God's hands as we pray for their well-being and wisdom to make good decisions.
ReplyDeleteSusie, praying for your anointing to overflow your container today! And for the kids, the way we heard it is to ask God to tell us whenever they are doing something they shouldn't be doing, interrupt us with a warning, even wake us up if necessary, and reveal what's going on. I'd rather be the one to catch them than someone else!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Jillian! I know you're right...these days trusting God to take all the seed we've put in them and make it grow into wise decisions is the parental challenge of the hour!
ReplyDeleteNiki, I needed this post, too. That fallible person I'm so disappointed in is myself. Now I need to renew my spirit and move forward. Thanks, Niki. Hugs on the situation with your kids. I'm praying!
ReplyDeleteThis post was posted on God's timing! I'm beginning Beth Moore's; A Heart Like His study and have been immersed in these verses this week! Thank you for these beautiful God-inspired words that are an excellent companion to what I have been learning this week!
ReplyDeleteSuzie, I appreciate your prayers! Just as surely as God looks after our kids and uses us to bring correction or aid as needed, He sends us friends to encourage us and strengthen us in the work we're called to do. That's what all of you are to me. So when you're feeling fallible, rest assured, one of us is thanking God for you and the anointing on your life!
ReplyDeleteBex, I love Beth Moore's studies. They are so rich. Thank you for your kind words, too! Have fun with your study, I haven't done that one. Sounds awesome!
ReplyDelete