Friday, May 10, 2013

Dear Spammers . . .

We don't get a lot of spam here at the Inkwell, but I do on my personal blog.  So I thought I'd share this letter to all of you thoughtful spammers out there.




Dear Spammers:
First off, I would like to thank you all for your frequent visits to my blog. It encourages me, even flatters me, to think so many of you enjoy my entries as much as your effusive comments indicate. Sadly, as you may have noticed, I have been unable to allow any of them to show on my blog.
I know. I know. It's been a very difficult decision on my part. I mean, when my dear friends ###shoesforless, ###meds4u and play###free make such perceptive comments about my posts, it's hard to delete them. I can but admire your willingness to continue our oh-so-close and meaningful relationship by persisting with your comments despite the fact that, thanks to the miracle of the Wordpress spam filter, none of those comments ever sees the light of day.
I don't know how I've had the heart to delete such things as this literary gem:
I supposed i’d posting and let you realize your blogs is advantageous for uncovered the beneficial technique.I essentially enjoy your blog.Realistically, the posting is in actuality the most effective on this really worth although subject. I concur along with your data and will eagerly search forward for your forthcoming up-dates. Simply saying thanks is not going to just be adequate, for your amazing lucidity in the techniques. I will straight away take hold of your rss feed to remain updated of any updates.True operate and a lot accomplishment as part of your perform and internet business tries.Anyway preserve up the wonderful operate.Thanks.
Or this one:
Worthy to be visiting your blog again, it has been months to save me. Leak this article that i’ve been waited as a replacement for so long. I trouble this article to exemplary my position in the college, and it has selfsame subject-matter with your article. Thanks, significant share.
And who could resist flattery like this:
hahahah, your views are rediculous. get a brain you MORAN!!
I mean, only a "moran" would refuse to post a comment that's obviously so complimentary and so deeply heartfelt. Especially when it comes from someone hawking timeshare vacations.
But despite the creative use of words along with a playful and unfettered view of spelling and punctuation, I simply find myself unable to allow your comments on my blog. Perhaps it's time we both realized that this relationship isn't working out and move on with our lives.
It's not you. It's me.
But for all those lovely things you've been saying about my blog, thanks significant share!
Oh, and to the one who claimed he would be killed by the Russian mob unless I posted his comment . . . oopsie! :D


 Is it just me, or does the spam keep getting worse?  Have you ever had a really interesting spam comment?  Have you ever had even the slightest interest in what your spammer was selling?


DeAnna Julie Dodson has always been an avid reader and a lover of storytelling, whether on the page, the screen or the stage. This, along with her keen interest in history and her Christian faith, shows in her tales of love, forgiveness and triumph over adversity. She is the author of In Honor Bound, By Love Redeemed and To Grace Surrendered, a trilogy of medieval romances, as well as Letters in the Attic, The Key in the Attic, The Diary in the Attic and, coming up, The Legacy in the Attic, contemporary mysteries. Her new series of Drew Farthering Mysteries will debut in the Summer of 2013 with Rules of Murder from Bethany House.  A fifth-generation Texan, she makes her home north of Dallas with three spoiled cats.


15 comments:

  1. Superb blog! Do you have any tips and hints for aspiring writers?

    I'm hoping to start my own site soon but I'm a little lost on everything.
    Would you recommend starting with a free platform like Wordpress or go for a paid option?
    There are so many options out there that I'm completely overwhelmed .. Any tips? Thanks!

    Feel free to surf to my homepage - akc golden retrievers

    ReplyDelete
  2. SUHWEEET. after such a post, I am NOT going to dump that spam. It;s like perfect comic timing!

    Spam On!

    Superb Blog - don't we know it!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hahaha. Too funny -- both DeAnna and the first comment.

    I deleted some spam here yesterday. The amount seems to have picked up in the last few months.

    If only they really were reading this blog...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hello,

    As a new blogger, I always wondered about what happened with that spam stuff. Great post. Thank you for making me aware and alert of the situation in a very funny way.

    Piper

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hi, Piper, and welcome! With this blogging tool, we can delete spam from the comments section, but it still shows up with a "comment removed" place holder. However, we can also go into the dashboard and delete it there. That erases the spam completely, so unless you check the comments at just the right time (before anyone has removed the spam), most people never know it was there.

    Unless we leave one to make a point!

    ReplyDelete
  6. LOL that's perfect comedic timing.

    Thank you, DeAnna for this post.

    The problem I have with spam are the ones that post a comment that pertains to your post - they mention specifics and share enough that you feel they've read at least a small portion of your post - and then add their website like the 1st one above. I've left a couple of those on my blog because I've given them the benefit of the doubt.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Ha ha. I think a lot of them are from other countries, thus the abysmal grammar and overuse of adverbs.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Thanks for the morning giggles, DeAnna. I literally laughed outloud with your last comment, and then again with the first one. In comedy, timing is everything. I didn't know you were so good at comedy.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Oh good, I feel better knowing I'm not the only person who reads them and giggles.
    My question with spammers is WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE AND ARE THEY GETTING PAID? I mean, are there thousands of people sitting around creating absurd spam comments for free? And if they ARE getting paid, who pays them? And WHY?
    I don't get it.
    Fun post, DeAnna, and yes, that first comment... priceless!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Actually, I love some of the spam I get. Some of the word choices (obviously not from native speakers) are a hoot!

    Glad to give you all a giggle. :D

    ReplyDelete
  11. Great post DeAnna--and I'm cracking up over the first comment, too. Ahh.

    I definitely think our Inkwell spam has picked up.

    I was so embarrassed recently to have my email hacked. Just about everyone in my address book received links to buy whey protein or something. Ugh. At least it wasn't for a certain pharmaceutical.

    Thanks, DeAnna!

    ReplyDelete
  12. What a hilarious post!!!

    Oh the cleverness of you...

    ReplyDelete
  13. Oh my gosh, you nailed it, DeAnna! This was my favorite part: "I will straight away take hold of your rss feed"...for some reason, it cracked me up.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Hey, Piper! I just saw you over at Seekerville. Nice to bump into you in blog-land :+)

    ReplyDelete
  15. Oh yes, seem to be getting a lot of Spam on my Wordpress blog 'Medieval reader'. These tend to be the type common to word- press in my experience.
    Seem to be getting a lot recently, as yes, there are some gems. Some seem to slip through the net and make in onto to Moderation list for genuine comments.

    ReplyDelete

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