by Anita Mae Draper
Who'da thought a quiet, demure girl from Virginia could be such a comed--what's that you say? Gina is originally from Oklahoma...and she's not quiet...nor is she demure? Hmmm. Well, I only met my esteemed peep last year when she and I and Inky Dina were roomies at September's American Christian Fiction Writer's (ACFW) conference in St Louis, MO.
But now that you mention it...
Dina And Gina are old friends and what I really liked about rooming with them is they communicate on the same level. At the same speed. Getting into a conversation with them is not for the faint of heart. Me... I sat back and listened about 70% of the time, because the fun part was when Gina started a rant - meaning humorous indignation about something trivial that no one cares about except when she decides to make it an issue which turns it into something that should be outlawed. (deep breath)
Of course, she keeps a straight face while going on about it while everyone else is holding their sides and rolling on the floor.
How does she do it? It's a gift, that's what it is.
Inky Deb said something to the effect that laughter is one of Gina's 42 spiritual gifts. Oh wait - Deb just said it's a gift, Gina said she's received 42 of them.
Dina said, "Gina makes me laugh pretty much nonstop when I'm with her. I especially love her rants. She had my children and I cracking up over her lecture on why women shouldn't drive. I think she just wants a chauffeur. (Yes, I know, Gina. You were serious. Seriously hysterical.)"
Gina's rant about women drivers stopped me in the tracks when I first heard it because I thought she was serious. (Yes, Gina, we know you're serious.) Of course when I asked if she was serious she gave me this look...
Dina supplied us with a list of Gina's rants - now remember, Gina has flawless execution and reasoning when ranting about:
- showing emotion with your voice and not your face... to prevent aging
- how football victories are based solely on the hotness factor of the quarterback (a theory proven to me (Dina) by this year's Steelers/Broncos game by the way.)
- distractions during workshops (yes, Dina, I edited your words, LOL)
Deb remembers Gina's ‘training for a marathon’ rant. She says she still laughs whenever she thinks of it
But I think Gina's biggest rant is about the people who have the ability to attend Comi-Con while projecting a blase or indifferent attitude to this momumentous event. Dina says it's because Gina has a secret dream to attend Comi-Con. In her email, Dina wrote, "I love it when she (Gina) wears her Superwoman t-shirt."
I believe she wore it in St Louis. So that's what was flying around our room that night.
And I'll agree with Dina when she says, "But the best thing about Gina is that due to her theory on aging, she does indeed manage to keep a straight face throughout it all. :)"
Now look at this lovely face...
Does that look like someone trying to misguide you in any way? I tell you, it's a face you can trust. Maybe even be the next president of the ACFW. I'm just sayin'...
Have you met Gina yet? Heard one of her rants? Would you like me to film her doing one at the next conference?
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Anita Mae Draper is retired from the Canadian Armed Forces and lives on the prairie of southeast Saskatchewan, Canada with her hubby of 30 plus years and 2 of their 4 kids. She writes stories set on the prairies of Saskatchewan, North Dakota, Montana and Wyoming. Anita Mae has semi-finaled in the Historical Romance category of the ACFW's 2011 Genesis contest and finaled in the Inspirational category of the 2011 Daphne du Maurier, the 2011 Fool for Love, the 2011 Duel on the Delta and 2009 Linda Howard Award of Excellence contests. Anita Mae is represented by Mary Keeley of Books & Such Literary Agency. You can find Anita at http://www.anitamaedraper.com/
Anita!!!! You crack me up.
ReplyDeleteI kept reading thinking surely you'd get something wrong about me. Umm, no.
Every single one of my rants stem from logical evidence in support of my opinion.
:D
Film them! Film them! We could make a youtube series and Gina could go viral.
ReplyDeleteFilm them! You are the right person to do so, Anita. I agree with Dina, even though I've never heard a Gina rant. I've known enough people like Gina (though they are few and far between) to know those logical rants can be virtual gems. (pun intended)
ReplyDeleteI am about to learn, in person. Thanks Anita! Laughter as medicine is what we prescribe here on Self-Help day. you know what they say about God and the platypus.
ReplyDeleteGina somehow manages to do more in one day than most anyone I know. It's spooky. yup. She can write five times faster (mean write fiction, not take sermon notes) than anyone and apparently... quite successfully. When she talks about what she needs to do around the house and with the kids and still has to write a blog post for the next morning...you may then hear her talk about how great GLEE was. Maybe she is SuperWoman after all.
So, when she told us she was going to start training for a marathon, I actually believed her. Who knows. Maybe she just meant that her life IS a marathon.
Love you Gina!
thanks Anita. Great idea!
Hey Gina, I crack you up? Excellent! I was hoping to get a smile out of you this morning. :)
ReplyDeleteI wanted to add the pic of Inky's Angels, but couldn't seem to fit it with the text. :)
I remember one conversation after the ACFW banquet in St. Louis... regarding a most-certainly-not-CBA book that Gina & Dina had stumbled across... Yep, lots of laughs, lots of non-stop chatter. That conference was the first time I'd met Gina, too, and the reality of Gina far exceeding my perception of Gina (as gleened from our online relationship). Oh, and if you think she's pretty in her pics let me just say... she's prettier in person. You just want to pinch her!
ReplyDeleteOh Dina, I agree. That would be so much fun if Gina's rant videos went viral.
ReplyDeleteWhich reminds me that my 6 month old Nikon P500 CoolPix with 700ml automatic zoom broke in church on Sunday. :(
I was filming the special singer, stopped for the offering or something, then when I starting filming again, the LED screen image was split into 3 boxes... the right half was pink and the left was divided into 2 boxes, each showing a partial image. *sob
Must send it back to Nikon in the mail. I guess I'd better do that asap.
Anita Mae.
LOL, DebH - virtual gems
ReplyDeleteIf only the person who 'coined' the word, virtual, back in the 14th century could see how we use it today.
Yes, I'm using the word, coined, in a very loose - possibly even virtual - way. LOL
Thank you, Debra. And if I remember correctly, Gina was serious about training for a marathon. Her reasons were very sound. Her timing, impeccable.
ReplyDelete:D
Jen, I so agree with you.
ReplyDeleteTruth to tell, I didn't believe Dina was telling the truth when she walked in with the Amazonian creature and proceeded as if I needed no introduction. I kept peeking behind them looking for the real deal.
Well, Gina is the real deal and a powerful image when she puts on those 3...4...? inch heels. I felt quite miniscule walking down the street to dinner surrounded by Gina, Dina, Anne Mateer and Julie Klassen. And yes, that meal took soooo long because we couldn't stop laughing. Ah, the good times. :)
film them? no way! Do you know what camera lights do to one's complexion? Age it. That's why so many actressess have plastic surgery by the time they're 40. Look at untouched up photos of Cameron Diaz. She looks wrinkly.
ReplyDeleteI'd rather not be viral. Sounds painful.
DebH, we shall find time someday to meet so I can share a rant with you. trust me, there's always somethign in live to rant about.
ReplyDeleteUmm, you don't knit, do you?
Debra darling, I actually had intended to begin training for a marathon. Lasted two days. Problem with training is it's painful, sweaty, and consumes time I'd rather spend doing somethign less painful and sweaty.
ReplyDeleteMy new tv obsession is Alcatraz. It's creepy and suspensful and makes me ask too many questions while giving very little answers. A la Lost. Which the latter is an excellent perspective on eternity and time travel and how the latter is actually plausible. If I shared, I'd have to do a memory erase on all of you becuase Angie Breidenbach wants to use my explanation as the basis for her someday time-travel.
Oh, Jennifer. My appearance is a result of me using the Force (another of my spiritual gifts) on all of you to convince you that what you see is real. I'm rather dowdy. In fact, it's almost noon and I'm still in my pjs. Haven't washed my face in two days. But that's because excessive face washing loosens the muscles in one's face enhancing the eventual sag.
ReplyDeleteMuch could be said about Pack Law. just not online.
Really, Anita, you're camera broke in church? Wow. I say that's God's way of telling you not to goof off with technology during church.
ReplyDeleteI would never use a camera in church. Or text hubby. Or read my kindle.
At least not in a prominent place for all to see.
Umm, Anita, I'm only 5'4". Just a smidgen shorter than Harry Potter. But with heels . . .
ReplyDeleteI suppose those I wore that day elevated me 6" considering the platform under the toe. Those are my working-writer shoes. Dina is the real Amazon.
I'll wear sneakers around Williamsburg so Deb will attest to you that I'm a shorty.
Maybe this year at ACFW conference I'll leave all my heels at home and stick with my converse sneakers. Oh, but I have this snazzy pair of black heels that my MIL bought me a month before she passed away. They're my Lucky shoes. Literally. That's the brand.
Gina
ReplyDeletewould love the opportunity to meet. i don't knit, but i do crochet... occasionally. flabbergasted my older brother when i took it up because i'm the proverbial tomboy and he'd never seen me do anything overtly "feminine" other than cook in the kitchen (and that was forced because my momma wasn't going to raise a daughter who's inept in the kitchen).
when will you be in Williamsburg? as in Virginia? i'm in Va Beach and that trek isn't too far...
Thanks for the morning laughs, Anita Mae. And you, too, Gina. I saw your question about knitting to DebH. Does that mean you have a knitting rant? If so, I can't wait to hear it.
ReplyDeleteOh, yes, and Anita.... I just had this sudden moment of panic. You aren't bringing that camera one our train trip, are you? Please don't point it in my direction.
ReplyDeleteHey, DebH, girlie! I live in Richmond. I'm driving down that way in mid-March. Am trying to figure a way to spend at night at Dina's because, as my younger sister and I discussed, I need a day to miss my kids. That's a nice way of saying I need a mommy break.
ReplyDeleteMaybe we could have lunch the next day before I drive home? Does Dina have your e-mail addy?
Suzie Jo, I *may* have a knitting rant. May not.
ReplyDeleteIt's not that I'm anti-knitting.
I'm merely anti-knitting 24/7 regardless of the setting and by women who don't apppreciate the blessing of attending Comic Con.
click click click click click
This year I vow to wear my Wonder Woman t-shirt at conference.
Funny, Gina. I would never dare knit in front of people. I love to knit, but my needle-holding technique is not something I'd want others to see! I do not have the gift of coordination.
ReplyDeleteOh, too much good stuff going on here.
ReplyDelete1) Julie, Anne, and I do make quite a tribe of Amazonian blondes, and in her heels with the fake blonde streaks in her hair, Gina fit right in.
2) Gina really is beautiful in person. Photos don't do her justice. I think the "force" of which she speaks is an inner glow and wonderful personality.
3) Don't knit. Can't knit. Have no desire to watch others knit in public places. Clicking needles bug me because I'm very sound sensitive.
4) What else. Yes, I'm pretty sure I have Deb's address.
5) Pack Law was meant to stay in the Inky Cave ladies. Ahem.
Really, Suzie, you're knitting holding skill is that weird looking? I'm trying to imagine yet can't.
ReplyDeleteDina, Dina, Dina. What's what the list? Although I shant complain for I do love list.
1) JulieK, AnneM, Dina, Anita, and I had so much fun at TGIFs that first pre-conference night. Makes me want to ensure I arrive early again this year.
2)Inner glow? Hmm. I will say that it saddened me at conference to see so many tense, stressed, and/or unjoyful writers at conference. Enjoy life, people! So for anyone going to ACFW conference in Dallas this Sept, if you want to have toss aside all your writing angst, find me and Dina. We know how to chillax and laugh. We've drawn Anita into the fun size of the Force. Of course, add Cindy Hickey, Rachel Smith, Lisa Richardson, and Jennifer AlLee . . .well, we're have fun.
3) Knitting. *sigh*
4) Yay on DebH's e-addy. When we get closer to our CW date, we can make plans.
5) Sweetie, I don't think the pack stays in a cave.
Snicker. :D
ReplyDeleteOh Gina, I forgot about adding your giveaway and now it will take too long to switch into my blogger account when I should be making white chocolate butterflies to decorate my triple chocolate cheesecake.
ReplyDeleteAnd my Finnish grandmother taught me to knit when I was 12. I always enjoyed it but my arthritis likes the speed of typing better than the grip of knitting needles.
Okay, off to the kitchen but anyone want to add the giveaway to the post feel free to do so.
And yes, Suzie... the camera is a must. ;o
Anita, I'd addd the giveaway but my allotted internet time has expired. Must get back to workin on yard sale stuff.
ReplyDeletexo
g
Look what I miss for arriving late to the party. You all had too much fun today. :D
ReplyDeleteInky party in Virginia next month! Cant wait!
ReplyDeleteGina I knew you were serious about the marathon. I didn't make fun of you "then" but loved your enthusiasm
Gina is a deep, serious, and spiritual woman and I enjoyed hanging out with her at conference. Also very quiet. Maybe she is only that way for your benefit and you wear her out. (ok, so some of that is true like spiritual and hanging out with her at conf) Dragons and dinosaurs, Gina?
ReplyDeleteYes, Carrie, Gina is a deep, serious, and spiritual woman.
ReplyDeleteHowever, if she was quiet at conference, she was probably regenerating herself.
And about my camera:
ReplyDeleteGina - I am the official church videographer so I'm allowed.
And Suzie - my dear Suzie - I must take my camera on the train. I liken it to my time in the military when my rifle was my third arm... my camera is my 3rd hand... I don't do anything without it. Well, within reason.
I tell you what... I'll bring a paper bag for your head for when I take the interior shots. I'd ask you to leave, but then no one would know the scale of the roommette, now would they?
Not to worry, Anita. I plan to bring my camera, too. It's not as fancy as yours, but it's good enough for me. Just know ahead of time: I'm not ready for my close-up. You can take pictures of everything around you except moi. And no unauthorized photos of yours truly may be posted on Inkwell or any other place you like to share. ;-)
ReplyDeleteNot to worry, Suzie. I always show the subject what I've taken and then ask permission if I want to use it. No candid photos unless you're a model or celebrity. :)
ReplyDeleteToo funny!! I worked with a woman like that and she would just raise an eyebrow and I would fall over LAUGHING. It was a gift, for sure. I can hardly tell a joke without messing up the punch line, while my co-worker could make her grocery list funny.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing this really lovely side of Gina!